Thursday, January 7, 2010

9 Ways to Reduce Stress by Simplifying Your Style

9 Ways to Reduce Stress by Simplifying Your Style – By Brad Paul

The desire to reduce stress is a common goal for most people. We are so entrenched in our routines, habits, and ways of doing things we rarely stop and consider new ways of dealing with the stresses of daily living.

By simplifying your style, you are setting up how you are going to respond to stress creating events in advance. In other words, you are making a decision based on your desire to reduce stress in your life.

Your goal is to set up new ways of handling issues that bring about stress because of the negative emotions that they create. Here are 9 areas where you can simplify your style and in doing so reduce stress.

1. Stop Arguing

Arguing is a waste of time. No one ever wins. If you win an argument, the other person feels slighted and annoyed by you. If you lose, you feel this way about them.

Simplify your style into being a person who does not argue. You do this because you recognize the senselessness of arguing and your desire to reduce stress in your life.

2. Stop Giving Your Unsolicited Opinion

Closely related to arguing is the compulsion to give your opinion when you haven’t been asked for it. People instantly become resistant and defensive when someone gives their unsolicited opinion.

There’s a fine line between giving your opinion and offering a suggestion in a situation where some serious damage might occur. In these situations, I have found that asking carefully worded questions about the issue of concern works best.

Simplify your style into being a person who doesn’t give your opinion unless you’re asked for it emphatically. You do this to improve your relationships and reduce stress in your body.

3. Stop Reacting When Others Speak Angrily

When people talk angrily about something, our tenancy is to react to their anger by getting tight, defensive, and stressed. Unless the anger is directed at us, there is no logical reason to react this way.

You are not responsible for the other person’s anger, and no one else is responsible for causing or getting rid of your anger. If someone insists on vocalizing their anger about something, don’t allow yourself to be drawn into it.

Modify your style into being a person who does not react to another person’s anger. You do this because you know that it will reduce stress in your body and protect your health.

4. Stop Requiring Perfection of Yourself & Others

Perfection is an impossible objective. In reality, the drive for perfection gets in the way of creativity.

Giving up the need for perfection is a clear-cut way to reduce stress. Simplify your style into being a person who doesn’t require perfection by knowing that it’s a fool’s quest.

5. Stop Trying to Please Everyone

Trying to please everyone is insanity. If you consider all the variations of personalities and likes and dislikes of people, it should be obvious that trying to please everyone is impossible and a waste of time.

If you were to just focus on pleasing yourself, the other people around you would reap the benefits because you’d be more fun to be around. If you are constantly in a frenzy trying to please everyone around you, it’s unlikely that you’ll be in good spirits.

Modify your style into being a person who does not try to please everyone. You do this because you know it will lift the weight of the world off your shoulders and reduce stress in many areas of your social life.

6. Stop Trying to Make Everyone Like You

Do you like everyone you meet? No one does. Knowing this, why should you expect everyone to like you?

Many of us have the most trouble with this when it comes to family and friends. The hard truth is that sometimes your relationship will certain individuals will never be as close as you want or need. What’s the answer? Find other people to achieve the closest you desire.

When we join a group that participates in an area that we identify with strongly we expect to have an easier time of getting along with the members. In many respects, you will, but personality differences will still be factor. If you join an organization with broader objectives like a fitness club as opposed to a vegetarian group, you may find more people that you get along with well.

Simplify your style into being a person who does not try to make everyone like you, but rather a person who relies on just being yourself. You do this because you understand the impossibility of making everyone like you and to reduce stress in your social activities.

7. Stop Grieving About Past Mistakes

Grieving about mistakes you’ve made in the past is a clear waste of time. The only possible outcome is that you’ll feel depressed in the present! And when you feel depressed, you greatly reduce your ability to take constructive action today that will improve your future.

If we hope to make the most of the present, we must be in the best possible state of mind. To do that we must keep our focus in the moment and on what we want to experience. When we think about the things we want, we bring about positive feelings that will energize us rather than depress us.

Adjust your style into being a person who doesn’t grieve about mistakes in the past but rather rejoices in what you have today and what you intend to manifest in the future. You do this because you know that by not grieving about past mistakes you reduce stress and increase the likelihood of positive results in the future.

8. Stop Worrying About What Might Happen in the Future

By worrying about what might happen in the future, we actually create the conditions for manifesting it. Most things we worry about never come true. According to the Law of Attraction, it takes a lot more negative thoughts to bring about bad results than it does to manifest positive outcomes. This explains for me why most of what we worry about never comes true. Worry is a waste of time. It’s also very damaging to your physical and mental health.

Simplify your style into being a person who doesn’t worry about what might happen in the future, but rather a person who imagines living the future that they desire in the present. You do this because you know that according to the Law of Attraction, you bring about what you think about and it will reduce stress in your body and life.

9. Stop Researching & Analyzing So Much and Start Doing

Researching and analyzing things in order to make the best possible decision is a good practice if it leads to a timely decision to act! If the research and analysis goes too far and decisions are postponed, this is a stress-producing problem.

The person who does no research makes decisions blindly, so little courage is required. The person who researches and analyzes things to nth degree usually lacks the courage to make decisions. The person who does a predetermined amount of research and analysis, makes timely decisions based the information at hand and their gut feelings, which requires considerable courage. The best practice then is to model your style after the people in the center of the continuum.

Modify your style in being a person who does a predetermined amount of research and analysis and then makes a timely decision based on the information gathered, gut feelings, and courage! You do this because you know that it will reduce stress and improve your productivity.

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If you think about the people in your life you admire, many of them probably have the style that I am encouraging. This style will reduce stress, enhance your health, and earn respect from others.


About the Author:
Brad Paul is the founder of http://www.GuruHabits.com, which provides FREE self improvement and lifestyle enhancement resources.

Brad left home at 15, lived in a boy’s home, graduated college with honors, headed a marketing group responsible for $400 million in annual sales, started a non-profit social services organization, wrote 3 books, and now works on projects that improve people’s lives.

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